From Darkness to Light

Darkness to Light… My story in a letter of thanks to everyone who helped my family and I get through the first 2 months without my father.

Our tragedy crashed into our lives and brought all to a screeching halt. The holiday's were approaching, but we were paralyzed. In my house, there were no decorations except for a snowman in his winter attire that perched on the back of the couch. The few presents I bought were wrapped but placed in a box, the annual ugly Christmas sweater party went unplanned, no holiday parties were attended, no cookies were baked, and the house was thick with layers of extraordinary sadness.

But then light came flooding in, in the shape of random acts of kindness. Angels came in all forms of tenderness and support showering compassion and hope upon us. The beauty of it has left us truly breathless and helped us to gather the pieces of our broken hearts, so that they can begin to mend. We have been awash in the love of friends; some lifelong and familial, some merely acquaintances, some absolutely new. Yet, the common chord that rang true throughout was that the human heart is large and humanity, lovely indeed. It is empathetic and bleeds for others who are hurting. It yearns to provide comfort and help carry the heaviest loads. It is self sacrificing and gives freely and creatively. This is the magical gift you blessed us with at our darkest hour; The renewed belief that love wins out.

We have the most sincere gratitude for these generous acts to which you so thoughtfully contributed; from flowers to photos, quilts to casseroles. We thank you so kindly for the heartfelt donations, the gift cards and meals, the memorial planning, preparation, attendance, the travel and time, the amazing words and tender memories shared that will remind us of my dad’s spirit to warm us and carry us through our heart’s dark winter with a blanket crocheted from authentic grace.

I am so grateful to have had you show outwardly how my dad has touched your life, I am also so happy to be able to have witnessed and feel firsthand what good friends and family are, what true love looks like, what makes God smile and say “job well done.” You have been that to our family and our hearts are full of awed gratitude for the outpouring of genuine benevolence you have given during this time. We are truly humbled.

Thank you from our hearts
Heather and Family

The check marks......

Christmas morning, I felt a huge sigh of relief that the holidays were almost over. I know that's not what I should be thinking or how I should be feeling on Christmas morning, but the truth is, I just couldn't wait for it to be over.

It became exhausting trying to avoid the holiday c​o​n​v​e​r​s​a​t​i​o​n​s and trying to be pleasant for others when really, I have been bitter, angry, sad and jealous. Yes, jealous. I'm jealous that so many get to celebrate their holiday with their whole family. I'm jealous that their biggest worries were what to buy or what to cook. I really just wanted to scream to so many people how lucky they are. But that's not fair to them that they've been blessed with healthy (and living fathers).

But, we have all made it through the first year of holidays, and we simply put a check mark on it, and wait for the next thing/holiday to come, so we can check it off..... it simply is only a check mark.

Happy New Year!

Well, since its January 3, 2011 and my last post was in September 2010, its about time to post.

A LOT has happened in 2010, and I am not going to mention them, but instead concentrate on 2011 and making it the best year.

SO here is to 2011~!!!